Hiding and Lying - There's a Better way when you're Transgender

For many of us, it is a struggle to live and be honest with whom we are each time we look in the mirror. It is much harder to be rel with the community around us. If it's work, or school, your family or friends, being a woman in a man's body is not easy.

But many Tgirls have to hide to protect themselves. It's simply not safe to go full-time. You can loose your job, your marriage or even be beaten and killed in some places. You have to take each situation and location into full account before you judge someone for coming out of not.

But let's say you have an ideal situation as I do here in South Florida. You can come out safely and you can be a transgender woman safely. There is a point where we want to hide or better said, protect ourselves, and  a point where it is a lie. Knowing this point is critical! What I mean is this: Are you a lier to those around you because you can't face the fact that you are a Girl in a Man's Body? Have you lied to yourself? Pretending and denying the facts that you will never be a guy.

When we cross the line from protecting and coping to lying and faking who we really are, we harm ourselves. We head to a slow death where destruction, self hatred and suicide are real endings. I recommend to you, as a Transgender female who has done this herself, to come out and be open to yourself first! Then be real and genuine with those you trust around you next. Then proceed to family and coworkers as you see fit.

When we lie to ourselves and those who love us, eventually the truth comes out. It always does and someday and somehow, the truth about you being transgender will surface. It is far better to be in control of how you are "outted" by you being the revealer, than to have someone else "out you". You have no control when others declare that you're a woman in a man's body. They have the wheel at that point. Lies get you in the place where others can hurt you. Then you look bad as you have been a deceiver.

Take control of your life and make a planned goal where you get real with yourself and then a slow introduction to others about your being trans. Stop lies and be truthful. Most times, you will be pleasantly surprised at how people will accept you and how they want you to be happy. Only you can decide what is safe and wise. Take my advice, but you and only you know what is smart and will not harm you. I do not.

Jenny
http://www.facebook.com/jennifercohenhappy
jennifercohenhappy@gmail.com